The Trouble with Beards:6

At long last I was able to recline, enjoy a meal and converse with Greg Boone.  We shared a few laughs, a few tears and a few delicious steaks.  His steak was slightly more bloody than mine, but we put our differences aside and got down to business.

Greg, I’ve known you for many years and you’ve run the gamut of facial hair.  I believe when I first encountered you, you were sporting the stache — how long did you rock the stache?

Greg: I don’t know if I had just the stache when you met me… (trails off down memory lane)

Me: You just had the stache in ’97.

Greg: I had the stache for…(consults wife)  I think I had it from the time I was at least a sophomore in college.  From the time of say — 21 until now at 43, I have had at least a moustache on my face.  I’ve only been clean shaven once.

Me: And that was probably startling to all of your friends?

Greg: It was very startling.  My children ran — they didn’t recognize me.  Leanne would not have sexual relations with me at all until it grew back.

(a non-bearded listener gasps)

Me: (also startled) Wow…

(Greg’s wife, Leanne, delivers a flying Superman punch to Greg’s throat)

Me: You have run the gamut in facial hair.  You had the stache, you normally rock the goatee, but currently Greg — you are doing the full beard.  What is the community response?

Greg: So far it has been pretty good.  Once you’ve had the goatee, it’s not that dramatically different.  It does kind of change the jawline a little bit.  And of course I am growing the hair out at the same time.  It is sort of a mountain man thing happening.

Me: You are more burly than I have ever seen you.

Greg: I’m very burly.

Me: Now that you’ve had your beard for however long you’ve had it, what have you found to be troubling?

Greg: It’s probably the trimming.  Mine grows pretty far up (pointing to bottom of his eyelid).  It grows way up over the cheek bone.

Me: You always keep yours short — pretty close to your face.  I can’t do that because as you can see I kind’ve look like I have the mange (I point to my tattered little beard), but you can fill yours out and that is exciting for me for you.

Greg: Yes.

Me: Thanks.

Greg: You’re welcome.

For the full interview, click below for your listening pleasure.



Filed under The Trouble with Beards

4 responses to “The Trouble with Beards:6

  1. Maggie

    That was my favorite thus far.

  2. ben

    as a little tiny lily set in a fresh meadow beneath a watershed, your constant, excellent, exuberant reports are always well synchornized. thanks!

    • Kevin

      O Ben, you are truly a Wordsmith. The delicate drops of silver that project from your mouth are likened to the sheen of metal objects on a rainy evening.

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